NBA Eastern Conference Playoffs Preview

Side note: before I start my blog, my prayers and thoughts go out to anyone who was effected in any way by the tragedy that took place at the Boston Marathon on April 15. The world is getting progressively worse in terms of caring for our fellow humans by the day, and it makes me sick to watch. To all the families of victims, my prayers are with you.

Well, it's the most wonderful time of the year, ladies and gents! That's right, the NBA playoffs are upon us! 


And you know what, I'm extra excited this year. Not only because this season was one of the most entertaining in recent memory, but also because I get to watch it simply as a fan. My 76ers just missed the playoffs (and by just missed, I mean they've basically been out since the All-Star break, suffered a season where Andrew Bynum played as many minutes as Steve Carell, Roddy Piper, Antonio Alfonseca and myself combined, and we are currently witnessing the ugly breakup between Doug Collins and the organization. At least Damien Wilkins put on a clinic in the stretch run. And by clinic, I mean shined on a team where no one gives a shit anymore). So, I have no attachment to any one specific team. I get to watch these playoffs as a fan of the NBA. I get to root against the teams I don't want to win (in case you're asked this by a man threatening to steal your television this week, and the only way he won't take it is if you get it right, here's who I'm siding with this year. I'm rooting against the Lakers, Heat, Knicks, Celtics, and Bulls. I'm rooting for the Bucks, Nuggets, Thunder, Clippers, Spurs, Rockets and Grizzlies. I'm completely indifferent about the Hawks, Pacers and Warriors. If the Warriors had more of a chance, I guess I'd be more excited about them. Maybe it's just me, I think Stephen Curry is the most underrated annoying dude in the league. Well, not including Nick Young. No, nevermind, including Nick Young. I really don't care for Stephen Curry.) 

My wish is for a Bucks-Grizzlies NBA Finals, just to rally the blood of the higher-ups of the league. And that would actually be a really entertaining matchup, I think. But realistically, I'm rooting for a Heat-Spurs NBA Finals. Sure, consensus will be rooting for the rematch of last year's Heat-Thunder finals, but is that what we really want? We have plenty more to go in the Durant vs James saga, how much gas is left in the tank of the rarely visited Duncan vs James rivalry? Can we even call it that at this point? The two met back in 2007, when LeBron was still a good dude and had loyalty to Cleveland. The Spurs swept the Cavaliers in pretty easy fashion, and James went home without a ring while Duncan had almost a hand's worth. Wouldn't you love to see one more bout between three of the league's thirty best players ever? Dwayne Wade, LeBron James and Tim Duncan putting it all on the court? Duncan's probable last appearance in an NBA Finals? I would love to see the battle between Popovich and Spoelestra, it would be the Heat's head coach finest test yet. We have plenty more chances for Durant vs James, this may be our last shot at Duncan-James. And maybe I'm the only one who cares this much, like I said, I'm pumped!

First things first, let me make it clear to all of my readers that the NBA playoffs are the best of all of the four major sports. Personally, I don't watch the baseball playoffs unless my Phillies are in it. There just generally slow and boring, minus a game or two each year. I'm not liking my chances of watching the rest of the playoffs waiting to see one or two exciting ones. I guess you could call me a baseball racist. Well, don't call me that. We have no room for cyberbulling at the Nugget Blog. The NFL playoffs are awesome, and are definitely the closest (for the record, the NHL playoffs are not getting a sentence. They only get this parentheses shoutout. Hockey, woo, all right!) to the NBA in terms of excitement when your team isn't in it. But they are only on weekends and if you have one bad game, your season is done. The NBA playoffs go on for about a month, and there is at least one game basically everyday. The action is awesome, the first round makes for some interesting subplots and sometimes upsets, and the action is awesome. Remember the eight seeded Warriors in 2007? That could be the Bucks this season! Why are you shaking your head? You don't think Monta Ellis can upstage LeBron and company? Hmm, I see where you're coming from. 

All right, let's get her done (there is a 55% chance Larry the Cable Guy is broke, scans low traffic volume blogs for usage of his jokes, and is currently trying to find my information to sue me. And you know what, I'm all right.). I'm going to break this preview up into the Eastern Conference first and post my Western Conference preview later. I'm doing this for time zone reasons. I don't want my people out in San Diego to be reading this during dinner, we have lost the traditional family supper conversation in society today. Readers, go have dinner with your family tonight. Not just eating at the same table, actually talk to them. Life lesson #34 from us (me) here at the Nugget Blog, value family dinner conversation. Some people are on awkward first or blind dates at the same time as your supper. 

EASTERN CONFERENCE PLAYOFFS- FIRST ROUND

(1) MIAMI HEAT vs (8) MILWAUKEE BUCKS
     I might be the only one on this planet who doesn't think this series will be as bad as The Incredible Burt Wonderstone. Which, by the way, overtook Bicentennial Man and Stuck on You as the worst movie I've ever seen. There was zero character development and very few funny jokes. Steve Carell wasn't even good in it, arguably the first time I've seen him just really not even try in a movie. Which got me thinking to rank my favorite Steve Carell film performances, because The Office will always be his best regardless. So my top five looked something like this, starting with five, Anchorman (would be higher since this is my favorite comedy of all-time, but he isn't really in it enough to constitute as a Steve Carell movie. Still, I loved this too much to leave it off the list. Brick is a genius.), Get Smart, Hope Springs, Crazy Stupid Love, and The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Honorable mention to Despicable Me. The sequel for that looks really funny too, which leads me to congratulating Ellen on getting the sequel to Finding Nemo that she has been advocating for years, Finding Dory. I'm just waiting for the sequel for Dumb and Dumber. What, they already made one? 

So yeah. This series is going to bring all of the basketball conservatives out of their holes and bring up their desperate plea to change the playoffs around so shitty teams like Milwaukee don't make it. True, they were 5-14 in March. Sure, they are in the playoffs and under .500. Sure, they have about as much of a chance at beating Miami as Amanda Bynes has at a respectable comeback, but hey! You never know, what if LeBron tears his Achilles tendon in Game 1? Or Dwayne Wade isn't 100% for the series? The Bucks could realistically steal the series if one of them goes down, or steal a game or two at least. I wouldn't count this team out just yet just because of their skid down the stretch. They had nothing to play for, they weren't escaping that fate of the eight seed. And they all but had the eight seed clinched, so they really had no incentive to play. I know Brandon Jennings and Monta Ellis will get up for this series. Saying all of this, do I think the Bucks win this series? Tell them what they've won, Vince. This series ends in five, Miami moves on. 

(2) NEW YORK KNICKS vs (7) BOSTON CELTICS
     I wrote the Celtics off when Rajon Rondo was lost for the season. I believed that this team was not good enough anymore to even reach the playoffs in a diluted Eastern Conference. And while the C's haven't exactly impressed anyone, limping into the playoffs as essentially a .500 team, that is impressive in itself. Boston was without its best player and starting point guard, and still made the playoffs as a seven seed. And really, they could make some noise with drawing the Knicks.

The Knicks are probably the hottest team in the league right now. Carmelo Anthony added a scoring title to his mantle and the Knicks look poised to win a playoff series for the first time since "Sexx Laws" and "Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely" were up for Grammy awards. Surprisingly, neither of them won one. Also, the end credits from Cast Away took home the Grammy that year for Best Instrumental Composition. If you're wondering why the theme song from Grounded for Life didn't win, we're in the same boat brother! Side note: to really get the most out of that link and my joke, skip ahead to :56 on the video. To really get the most out of this blog, watch the entire video. Back to the Knicks, New York is playing its best basketball of the season at the best possible time. However, I don't believe in them in the playoffs for one reason. "If you live by the three, you will die by the three." Just like "There's always money in the banana stand." Can you tell I'm a little amped for the fourth season of Arrested Development? Because that's probably one of about fifteen more references I'll make (spoiler alert!). But seriously.

The Knicks led the league in three pointers made and attempted. Thats all fine and dandy, but the Boston Celtics opponent shooting percentage from beyond the arc? 33.9%. Good enough for a tie for second lowest in the league. If that doesn't convince you, than should I bring up the fact that its been over a decade since the Knicks have won a playoff series again? Sure, before I go on bashing the Knicks, I was sold on them in the beginning and even as late as midseason. Why am I weary now? Because I've seen this charade before from teams- convincing us they are on a hot streak so they will ride that to the Finals before flaming out in the first round. Why would the Knicks be any different when Carmelo has never proven his worth in the postseason? Maybe this will be the year he turns it around, I'm just not sold. Kevin Garnett and Paul Pierce have too much experience and Doc Rivers is too cool to be one and done. Close series, probably seven ugly games. The Celtics win.

(3) INDIANA PACERS vs (6) ATLANTA HAWKS
     Hello. My name is Pat and I recently took a sip from the Atlanta Hawks Kool-Aid. Phew, feels good to get that off of my chest! It is true though. I was debating how the playoffs would pan out a few weeks ago with my buddy, and I was bold enough to be such an ass and claim the Eastern Conference Finals would be Heat-Hawks. The friggin Atlanta Hawks in the Eastern Conference Finals.

Up until about a week ago, it didn't look nearly as ridiculous. Atlanta had played its way from borderline seventh seed to a comfy seat in the fifth seed. After playing like total ass down the stretch, and losing to the red hot Knicks on the final day of the regular season, Chicago snuck up and stole that fifth seed. Although, maybe it is a breath of fresh air for Atlanta, who I swear ends up with the fifth seed every single year. And they bore us like the person who follows Seth McFarlane to host the Oscars inevitably will. But I'm sticking with my gut. Not enough to pick Atlanta over Indiana anymore, but to at least make of a show out of it.. Hmm. I guess that isn't really sticking by my Eastern Finals pick. I just can't, everytime I am sold on the Hawks, they screw me and leave me listening to Staind alone in my car. This isn't completely true, I only did that after I saw  Scary Movie 4. And it would probably have to be some hardcore Papa Roach if I saw Scary Movie 5. 

The Pacers are too good defensively to be one and done, and the Hawks are just the kind of team to make Indiana look a lot better than they really are. Roy Hibbert and Al Horford is the match I am most looking forward to. Sure, Josh Smith, George Hill and Paul George are entertaining, but I love watching these two big guys play. The battle for the boards will be great between these two team leaders, but I see Hibbert coming out on top. Indiana just plays much better small ball than Atlanta, and that will be the difference maker. There will be a few flashes where the Hawks look like they can win this series, but they'll be just that. Flashes. What's interesting is where Josh Smith and his future in Atlanta will settle if the Hawks lose in the first round. Does he sign multi-year deal with the perennial first round exits? Or does he get enticed by a, say, Philadelphia team? Or Boston? Or a team looking to replace an aging player soon, with cap space and an owner willing to roll the dice? I'm looking at you, Mark Cuban. Dallas misses the playoffs for the first time in 13 seasons, it seems like the perfect time to take a shot on overpaying Smith (which will definitely happen). All of the sudden, if Dirk is healthy next season, Dallas has Josh Smith, Dirk, OJ Mayo, Vince Carter and Elton Brand or another big guy. That isn't a bad starting five. Not great, but not bad. 

Pacers win this series in five. Sorry Atlanta, at least the Braves are good again. 

(4) BROOKLYN NETS vs (5) CHICAGO BULLS
     This is the epitome of stale playoff series. If the series goes seven, four of the games will be played in Brooklyn where you need a flashlight to watch the game. Chicago is teasing us with this "Well, Derrick Rose hasn't been ruled out out yet" crap, Reggie Evans is playing like he has some sort of thing to prove to us all (even though 85% of fans don't know who he is) and both teams just don't excite me. I don't like the Nets, and haven't since the start of the season, solely because they rely too much on guys like Gerald Wallace, Joe Johnson, Reggie Evans and Kris Humphries. A team with one or two of those guys can get away with that, a team with all four can't. They just can't, right?

I know this pick will backfire as I make it, but I'm picking Chicago in the ugliest seven game series we'll ever see. Lots of low scoring games, but not that impressive of defense. Lots of mentioning the Nets first season in Brooklyn. Lots of wondering how the series would have gone had Rose played. Lots of flashbacks to last season's Bulls first round upset at the hands of the 76ers (that I won't mind as much). And seven games of slightly above average basketball.

If the Nets win, I feel obliged to buy a Reggie Evans Brooklyn jersey. Bulls in seven.


EASTERN CONFERENCE PLAYOFFS- SECOND ROUND

(1) MIAMI HEAT vs (5) CHICAGO BULLS
     This involves the team Miami did not want to draw. The team that pretty easily ended the second longest winning streak in NBA history just a few weeks ago. Whose to say Derrick Rose doesn't get up for this series, seeing a chance to come out of nowhere and end one of the greatest teams in NBA history's run for a repeat championship? A repeat championship that would be the first time an Eastern Conference team has won back to back since.....the Bulls did with MJ. 

It won't matter, this is Miami people. LeBron didn't forget that stinging loss to Chicago. Wade and Bosh didn't either. LeBron wanted that streak. Not just for the fame, but because you could see it in his eyes that he came alive during that streak. For himself, he was a new player. That old LeBron passion was out again towards the peak of the streak. He wanted to win 34 in a row, and because of the Bulls, he didn't. He will do everything in his talent pool to make sure he doesn't miss out on a chance to win a second ring at the hands of the Bulls, too. 

If D-Rose comes back for this series, all bets are off. I, personally, think he just messes things up mojo wise and creates havoc on the floor. But, whose to say his presence doesn't inspire Chicago, and the Bulls end up with a colossal upset? Would it even be an upset? I mean, this time maybe two seasons ago, I was building up the Bulls as the best team in the league. That starting five of Rose, Noah, Deng, Boozer and Hinrich (to bully LeBron around) is pretty great and complete. I still think Miami wins this series through sheer drive from LeBron and company, but it is really close. I really hope this series happens, because the bad blood between these two teams just flat out works. They don't like each other, and I don't know if it started with that streak-ending game, but I don't care. It makes for awesome hoops. Miami wins this in six hard-fought games. 

(3) INDIANA PACERS vs (7) BOSTON CELTICS
     Have I mentioned that I believe in teams responding to criticism? No? Well, I do. Boston was counted out as soon as Rondo went down, blah blah blah. You know that story, now you're just anxiously awaiting my opinion on if they can really make another Eastern Conference Finals, this time without the catalyst of their team. Or you're not reading, you're doing that thing where you blindly read but your mind is actually elsewhere. Watch, you still haven't noticed I caught you, let me reel you back in. The cats in the cradle, and the silver spoon. Little boy blue, and the man on the moon. When you coming home, dad, I don't know when. But we'll be together than, dad, you know we'll have a good time than.

If I didn't reel you in, and instead lost you, well, so be it. The Celtics lose here too. 

Indiana is not good enough to play in the Eastern Conference Finals, can I make that clear? I don't want people getting sold on the Pacers because they will win two playoff series. The East is just that bad this season that I can't find any other team good enough to make it, based on the matchups we have. The Knicks might have had they not played Boston. If they got Atlanta and Chicago, somehow, I would give them the nod. But Indiana can beat the Celtics pretty easily, they are that good. Hibbert will explode against and aging and slow team, and I would put money on Paul George to outshine Paul Pierce in the Battle of St. Paul. The Pacers win this series in five, officially ending the Big Three's time in Boston.

Just kidding, just wanted to throw something controversial at you to make sure you're still paying attention.

EASTERN CONFERENCE FINALS
(1) MIAMI HEAT vs (3) INDIANA PACERS
     The Miami Heat are far and away the best team in the league. There is no question about it. The Eastern Conference is the weakest it has been in years. The injuries to Derrick Rose, Rajon Rondo, Danny Granger and Amar'e Stoudemire have dampened the already weak conference even more, expanding the difference between Miami and everybody else. The Chicago Bulls ruled the 90's, the Lakers and Spurs ruled the early and latter part of the 00's (respectively) and now Miami will rule the 10's. Do we call it the 10's? That looks weird, good for the people who lived from 1920-2009, they didn't have to endure a time period with such an awkward name. That's a solid 89 years in my book.

The Pacers gave Miami a run for their money last season, somewhat sneaking up on the Heat en route to a 2-2 series in the Eastern Conference Semifinals. That won't happen this year. Like I said, Indiana is not as good as making it this far might make them look. The Pacers are still young, and lack a go-to guy who can save this series for them once LeBron or Wade lock in and go on a run. Indiana has plenty of young pieces, but they need a guy like Granger to be completely healthy to make a realistic run at the defending champs. They have a great young nucleus that I hope they can keep intact with Granger, Hibbert, George, Hill and West. These guys play defense and know their intangibles. I think this series could possibly go six or seven, but I'm going to go with my gut and say it ends in five as Miami heads back to the Finals for a third straight season.

The East is kind of lacking any real suspense. I don't think any team is remotely ready to topple Miami at the top, and I don't think any team is even really close. The Chicago Bulls, when 100% healthy, are the team with the most reason to believe they can beat LeBron and Wade. Boston with Rondo seems to have their numbers. And that's it. No one else in this conference can beat Miami right now, and that is a testament to the Heat just as much as insult to the rest of the teams in the East. Miami is a machine. They won 27 games in a row this season. They are just the 14th team in NBA history to post a winning percentage of .800 or better (they won 66 games). LeBron James joins a short list of players (although most of the players are not exactly "stars") to have won 66 games on two different franchises. He did it with Cleveland, but could not end that season with a ring. Can he bring one to Miami again? Check out my Western Conference preview for my insight into that question and the answer to many more burning questions. Like why the Ravens should absolutely not gamble and take Manti Te'O in the draft (I think) and why the Phillies need to think about their future pretty soon. Well, those actually won't be addressed at all in my next blog. Sorry.

Thanks and comments are welcome y'all!